The unknown

There are these moments in life, which I call "groping-for-the-right-word" kind of moments. This was one such. A moment of wordlessness.

I found this while strolling down a tiny deserted alley in Porto, Portugal months ago. I was with a friend, and this was the last day of our five-day trip. It wasn't the best of weather that day, and we were desperately hoping that the sky would clear soon enough to let us go to the beach, as planned. When by early afternoon we figured that all our hopes of enjoying the Portuguese sun had been destroyed, we decided to not let the disappointment dampen our spirits and take a walk around the city instead. After a while, hunger struck, and we started looking for an untouristy place far away from the maddening crowd where we could eat 'traditional' Portuguese food. That was when this happened. 

We took a turn and there it was. Every house, on either side of the lane, had these pictures put up on their windows/balconies. I stared in amazement, wondering what it was all about. There wasn't anyone around, barring an old Portuguese who looked clearly surprised to see us. We wandered around a bit, soaking it all in, taking pictures, and then resumed our quest.

We came back, got busy with our lives, the picture almost fading from memory. Then today, while going through my archive, I found it again. Memories came rushing back, with that familiar question: what was it all about! I started thinking, maybe it didn't mean anything afterall. Maybe the locals were just religious and it was a way of expressing their gratitude to Almighty. Or maybe it meant something. Maybe it was a special day. I wished I knew. I wished I had asked.

But then I thought, maybe, some things were indeed better left unknown.

End of The Era

I see the social networking sites overflowing with ThankYou Sachin status messages, I see the madness surrounding the last two test matches (incidentally, one in my home town and the other in his :) ), I see friends celebrating his accomplishments as their own, I see people crying at the news of his retirement, I see the on-field crowd stunned into silence and then erupting in a roar of applause and cheers after the final innings, and my heart warms. How lucky he is to be loved and respected by millions, I wonder! And then I think, how incredibly lucky we are to have him.

I have never idolized or worshiped him the way most Indians have. I have not sat glued to the television everytime he played. I shall not be able to recall how many runs he scored or how many wickets he took on that final day of that particular match in that year (as my brother can, with ease). I do not know his career statistics by heart. I have had infinite arguments with the brother and a Ponting-fanatic to decide if he was indeed the greatest. But I do know that he has re-defined Cricket for us Indians. I do know that the guy is perfectly capable of creating miracles on the field. I do know that I always thought nothing bad could happen to India if he was around. And ofcourse, I do know that we share 'almost' the same birthday! :)

So while I can hardly take part in the mania that has engulfed the country right now, I can sit in my office and silently thank him for everything he has done for us till date. And all I can tell him is that you make us proud, very very proud. 

Take a bow Little Master. You'll be missed :(

p.s. I share with you my most favourite picture of him. Lifted by the team mates, The Tricolor in hand, and The Night when we conquered the world. Perfect, isn't it? :)

The plan

Off late, I have been going through this no-time-to-write phase, given the upcoming yearly seminar in a couple of weeks (which also marks the beginning of the third, and final, year of this damned PhD)! Quite evidently, I feel pretty much frustrated, irritated, in dire need of some sleep, praying for extra hours in a day, and not to mention the (n-1)th time questioning-myself as to why I started this PhD in the first place. 

I mean, this was not even the plan! I was never extraordinarily brilliant in studies, so my professional aspirations were also limited to a great extent throughout my school (and college) life. Studying till a certain age, experiencing love, having wonderful friends, getting married at 25, starting a family by 28, having a good job, traveling extensively, being satisfied with life by 30.. everything had seemed so simple back then. Half a decade later, the plan seems to have gone for a toss. On days like today, when I feel that the whole world is conspiring against me :-/, I take a deep breath and wish that I had stuck to the plan. I see 'got-married-to.../going-on-weekend-trips-with-friends../got-a-promotion' posts on Facebook ceremoniuosly piling up everyday, and sometimes I feel a tinge of jealousy. On days like today, I wish I had a family to pamper me when I complained about, well, everything; had someone waiting for me when I returned home (with a huge smile and a big slice of chocolate cake, ah); had eventful weekends with friends; had a clearer picture of the life after PhD, and had less things to worry about. But, strangely, on most other days I feel happy that I have not stuck to the plan. Doing this PhD, living thousands of miles away from family and friends, staying alone in a spooky apartment on the hills, having no time or energy to cook and therefore eating salad or bread for dinner on most days, didn't help a bit in accomplishing the things I had planned for. However, they taught me a great deal about reality and life. And ofcourse, that plans, how much full-proof and well constructed they might be, never ever work! :D

The Liebster Award

Let me begin this post by thanking Bhavana Lalwani (Life with pen and papers) who has nominated my blog for the Liebster Award. Apart from the fact that I am absolutely overwhelmed and can't thank her enough, I feel a big inverted-rainbow across my face right now. My first ever nomination for an award, and what more, given by a fellow blogger who has liked my blog! Clearly, my day is made :)

So before explaining the rules, let me just briefly mention what in the world this Liebster award is about! Liebster is a German word (which I had no clue about, even after staying in Germany for the past two years) which means sweetest, kindest, nicest, dearest, beloved, lovely, kind, pleasant, valued etc (Wikipedia, you rock!) It is an award given to new and budding bloggers who have less than 200 followers, as a way to boost their reputation in the blogging community! 

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Here are the rules:

1) Each nominee must thank and link back the person who nominated them.

2) Answer the 10 questions given to you by the nominator.

3) Nominate 10 other bloggers for this award who have less than 200 followers.

4) Create 10 questions for your nominees to answer.

5) Let the nominees know that they have been nominated by notifying them.

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Here are the answers to the ten questions that Bhavana has asked:

If you become India’s Prime Minister for one day, then what would be your first three decisions?

Being an economist who has seen how this world works from a closer distance, I would say (in no particular order), provision of education- not just basic, but atleast through high-secondary- to everyone so that they can make decisions not based on their blind beliefs and religious orthodoxies but on sound logic and understanding, complete elimination of child labor, and improvement of the sanitation system.

If the whole world fall asleep for one day except you and you are free to go anywhere and take anything, then where will you go and what things you would like to take?

Have never thought about this one. But now when I think about it, I would never really want the whole world to fall asleep even for a day. Being a garrulous person who talks incessantly, I believe I would suffocate if I would find no one to talk to. So, if I have to answer that question, I would say I would just sleep and then wake up when the rest of the world (or atleast one person) wakes up :D

Name your biggest fear.

Loneliness.

What is your idea of a dream vacation?

Somewhere in the mountains, where silences speak. The rest.. spontaneity :)

Do you believe in love at first sight?

No! Over the years I have realized that love is more than just first sight. So, no.

If you have given the freedom/power to rewrite some chapters of your life then, which things you would like to change or correct?

I am very tempted to name a few impromptu decisions and embarrassing mistakes that I had made. But then given the fact that life is a learning curve, I would not actually want to rewrite any part of my life; afterall those impromptu decisions and embarrassing mistakes have made me who I am today (a cliché, but very apt nevertheless).

Which film or novel or the character (you recently have read/watch) has impressed you most and why?

The one film that I have recently watched and have been clearly impressed is Julie & Julia. And why? Here is the reason why :)

Do you think or believe that the cyber world (social networking) can bring true and worthy relationships in our life? Please give a little explanation.

Yes. I have seen friends around me finding their soulmates through this cyber world. Love means understanding and being able to communicate properly, whatever the medium be. However, I personally do not see something like that happening for me. 

If you are given a chance to live someone else’s life for one week then, who would be that person and why?

I am intrigued by only one person in this world, who puzzles me to no extent. Time and again, I have thought what it is to be like him, to think the way he thinks, to feel the way he feels, the way he perceives a particular situation etc. We are poles apart in the way we think, which is why I often wish if I could get into his head. Wall-P, he is. 

Define the biggest ambition/dream of your life in one sentence.

To live a complete and happy life with people I love.

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Here are my ten nominations for the award:

Being Mommee..Love It. Like It. Live It.

Tes AP

The K- Factor

Tangled Vibes

Haute Kutir

My World of Food and Travel

Let Beauty be Your Constant Ideal

Labyrinths of Life

The Explorer of Miracles

Stir Your Souls

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And finally, here are my ten questions (the first ten questions that came to my head :D)

1) Three words that describe you the best.

2) Tea or Coffee?

3) Name one feature in you that you don't like. Could be physical, emotional, psychological, whatever. 

4) If you could travel anywhere in the world and money was no object, where would you go and why?

5) What's the first word/thing that comes to your mind when I say 'rain'?

6) Mountains or Sea?

7) Your take on First love? Do you believe that first love, like every first, is special?

8) The next thing on your to-purchase list?

9) Why do you blog?

10) The one thing that you would like to change about your city?

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Looking forward to many more interesting posts from you! Write on :)

A movie night

So, it wasn't the best of days today. I woke up late with a bad headache, tried to make chili tofu for lunch (a substitute for chili paneer that looks similar but sadly tastes different) which turned out to be not half as good as I wanted it to be, went out to buy grocery and instead ended up buying dozens of chocolates (and eating them all too, well almost), freaked out over work, felt demotivated, frustrated, and when nothing helped, slept. And then, the guy asked me to watch a movie. Julie & Julia. A movie on cooking, and Julia Child (the American cook who made French cooking hugely popular in the US). He said he liked it and I would love it too. Given that I have never been particularly fond of cooking and was already having a bad-cooking day, I wasn't sure if it was my kind of a movie or the right time to watch a movie, on anything. But then I just decided to watch it, partly because the guy who recommended it has a very good taste in movies and partly because I had nothing else to do. And, boy, o boy, did I love it!

The movie is a comedy-drama that contrasts the lives of two characters, set in two different time periods, but sharing a common love, a love for food. Basically, it gives a taste of the early years of Julia Child's (portrayed by Meryl Streep) career as a culinary expert on one hand, and the life of a young American writer (played by Amy Adams) who tries to find solace in cooking on the other. It's a simple yet a very well made movie, with a simple story-line, and some great acting. However, what sets it apart from most movies is that it a classic feel-good film that fills your heart with much happiness and never lets the smile leave your face. Also, the fact that it is entirely about food and the joys associated with (cooking and) eating good food, makes it so enjoyable. I don't remember the last time I watched a film that made me forget the events of a not-so-glorious day and made me hungry at 2 o'clock in the morning (the movie is all about delicious recipes and cooking, and therefore do not watch it on an empty stomach!). I could go on and on about the movie and what I liked about it, but I restrain myself from being another Wikipedia, and a spoilsport. So, I leave it at this and would really recommend others to watch it if you haven't already. Meryl Streep is a treat to the eyes, and if not for anything, watch it for her. She's a delight. Amy Adams, whom I didn't know before watching this movie, is also pretty good and very real-life like. Also, that most part of the movie is set in Paris (the place I consider heaven or close to heaven) makes it even more special. All in all, I think the movie has already climbed high up on my list of happy films and has put my soul at peace, finally :)

Stressbusters

Working late into the night in the office and trying desperately to find a research article from a heap of journals, you suddenly come across these. Small things that instantly pull the sides of the lips to a wide U (or a V)!

Months-old envelope sent from across the oceans on birthday. Reminds of happy moments and bubble wraps, followed by melancholic after-thoughts.

Half a year old train ticket, bought in Spain, en-route to a monastery with a friend. Realizations about being fortunate enough to have seen so many places. Smiles from ear-to-ear.

A filled-in diary given as a present a couple of years ago. Hand-written letters, memories galore and a spark in the eyes. Mixed emotions.

A picture of Calcutta while browsing randomly through Facebook. That heart-skipped-a-beat moment followed by the umpteenth-time realization that the City runs in the blood.

Instant stress-busters, I call them!  :-)

Fall colors

In school, we were often asked to prepare essays on 'Seasons of India' for our final exams. Given my limited writing potential, I would always ask Ma to write them for me and I would just memorize them and pour them out word-by-word in the exams. She would write about the six seasons- distinctively differentiating them with respect to the changes in weather, arrival of new fruits, vegetables, flowers and festivals. So while dub-er-jol (coconut-water) was a thing of Summer, pithe-puli (a Bengali dessert prepared with coconut and milk) would mean that Spring was round the corner. While unending rains would mean Monsoon, Durga Puja would mean Autumn and lightened up cathedrals and decorated Christmas trees would mean the arrival of Winter. No wonder, I started identifying the seasons not from the drop or rise in temperature but from the various activities and 'add-ons' they were associated with.

In Germany, however, seasons are different. They look and feel different too. Summer here means barbecue, beach volleyball, sunbathing and short dresses all around. Winter, which is painfully long, means intense cold, heavy snowfall, frozen nose, glühwein (mulled wine) and long overcoats and thick jackets. Winter also means Christmas markets, lights and candles and Christmas trees everywhere, and, gifts. Monsoon is vastly different from what we mean by Monsoon in India, and is marked by tiny patches of light to medium rains, severely cold winds and gloomy faces. Autumn, on the other hand, means unending Pujo posts on Facebook by friends back home, snapshots of the cloudless blue sky and kash-ful everywhere, Durga idols in the making, and acute homesickness. Maybe that is why, Autumn in Germany comes with a big dose of colors, that instantly lifts up the mood and partially takes away the pain of not being at home.

 

These pictures were taken while hiking with an ordinary phone camera, which, however did not manage to take away the essence of Autumn a bit :-)

This one I noticed a couple of days ago while coming back from the University. Red leaves adorning a window-sill. Colors never looked more pretty.

These were taken when I first came to Germany (strangely, it was in Autumn) two years back and decided to take a walk by myself in the hills one Sunday. Although I had no clue what awaited me, I was clearly bowled over. The sights mesmerized me, and I realized perhaps for the first time what Autumn meant. It meant a treat to the eyes.

This one, I used to pass by everyday while going to the University. The first time I saw it, it still had green leaves and I didn't give it a second look. But then the colors started changing and in a matter of just two months, the green leaves gave way to these dark yellow leaves. I wondered how something could look so beautiful and realized that Autumn, with its red and yellowish trees, fallen leaves everywhere, nice cold days, occasional blue sky, and, happy faces, did make up for the homesickness in the end :-)